Hello ladies! This Saturday, we are diverting from etiquette lessons to share a few tips and insight on increasing your femininity.

This article is for ladies who are interested in adopting a stronger feminine role and creating more female energy within themselves. It’s also for ladies who want to attract more masculine attention and/or appreciation.

Now, to be clear, a refined lady does not have to be ultra feminine. We do not want you to think that you have to be feminine to be refined. There are many gentlemen who are both refined and ultra masculine. Both feminine and masculine characters are capable of displaying grace and poise.

With that said, here are 8 ways to increase your femininity:

The feminine energy is motherly. It is open and approachable. It is kind, receptive and nurturing. It’s intimate, playful, and so pleasant to be around.

1.. Wear more dresses and skirts. There’s nothing like a dress to make a woman feel more like a woman… like a softer and more receptive version of herself. Maybe it’s historically based. Maybe it’s psychological. But it sure does work.

2.. Wear softer fabrics. When choosing clothing, go after dresses and skirts that are made of soft, flow-y fabrics. When you walk, you should be able to feel your clothing float around you – caressing your legs, moving when you move. The soft and flowy feel of the fabric will help you get in touch with your own soft and dreamy side.

When wearing such fabrics, remember to consciously notice the movement of the fabric against your skin. Make it a sensory experience. And enjoy how it feels, how it makes you feel. Revel in the experience!

3.. Wear heels more often. This tip is for the ladies who wear flats everyday. We encourage you to take your heeled shoes out of the closet or buy some new ones and wear them. Yes, flats are more comfortable. But they do very little in making you feel more feminine.

We recommend you do your own experiment. Spend one day walking with flats and another day walking with heels. On both days, take time to watch and examine yourself.

Which shoes made you swing your hips more? Which made you feel more feminine? Which made you glide more? Which made you think of sex and relationships more? Did your clothing style change? Was there a difference in attention given to you?

Now when we say heels, we don’t mean stilettos. You don’t have to wear very high heels to feel more feminine. You can feel just as feminine in shorter heels. As a matter of fact, if you wobble or limp because your heels are too high we recommend you do not wear them. Wobbling and limping are not attractive.

For this reason, we also recommend you wear heeled shoes as well as flats that are comfortable, that fit you well, and that allow you to walk for hours without any mishaps or wobbling.

4.. Wear lighter colors. Although dark colors like black, are flattering for a woman’s shape, they are not mood lifters. Instead, they are moody. They are harsh.

So, go for colors that make you think of cuddling, girly thoughts, genuine laughter, nurturing mothers, walking on clouds – colors like pink, white, light yellow, pale green. Go for softer shades.

5.. Send your body love. Every morning, look at yourself in the mirror. Tell your body how beautiful it is. Say it in a meaningful way. Repeat it at least 10 times. Now, look at your eyes in the mirror. Gaze into yourself. Then say: I love you.

6.. Soften your muscles and posture. Many women hold themselves rigid today. They have adopted the masculine energy so much they have lost the swing of their hips in their walk. Their lips are continuously pursed. And their shoulders are held stiff.

We recommend you take time to examine how you walk and stand. Do you walk stiff? Are your lips in a resting harsh or soft position? Does your back feel loose?

Softening your muscles doesn’t mean you should get sloppy in how you hold yourself. You don’t need to slouch or walk like a swinging pendulum. Instead, it means you should be relaxed. Stand relaxed. Sit relaxed. Walk relaxed.

7.. Take time out for you. If you are constantly on the go, you have no time to breathe or relax. This isn’t healthy physically or mentally. And it will result in your emotions and muscles stiffening and hardening. So, everyday, schedule in at least 30 minutes for you, just you – no kids, partners, bosses, TV, or music. Sit in silence and chill; lay down and think; drink hot tea while gazing admirably at a tree and ducks waddling by; or simply meditate.

8.. Take time to experience sensual pleasures. Everyday you should do something that caters to your senses. Meaning: touch something, taste something, see something, hear something, experience something, or visualize something that pleases your senses.

Here are some examples of sensual activities: rub your hand and face along a soft blanket; wear a soft silky dress; stand underneath a shower head and actively feel the water gliding down your body; eat at Moroccan-themed restaurant with your hands; watch a belly dance show; savor a mug of your favorite coffee; go to the beach and feel the waves rub against your skin; drive with the windows down and your hair loose; dance in a flower garden, rain-shower, or forest; touch yourself in a way that increases your confidence and love for your body; watch a photography-videography video online; rub softening oils onto your legs so that throughout the day you can touch them, feel how soft and smooth they are; wear your favorite perfume and actively take time to smell it on you throughout the day; or listen to a song that increases your passion.

Kinfolk Magazine: Issue 4 (An Ode to Summer) from Kinfolk (kinfolk.com) on Vimeo.

There are many ways you can increase your feminine energy. These are just eight. The key is: know you want to do so. So, go search for ways > find them, do them, acknowledge why you are doing them, and then analyze their effect(s) on you.